How to get fired when one is an Office Manager
You are an Office Manager and you can’t stand the sight of your boss or put up with the overflowing enthusiasm of your collaborators? You wake up every morning with the same obsessional question: when are you finally going to get fired? This is a legitimate question, here are a few tips to get fired as quickly as possible, if you’re an Office Manager.
Don’t take the well-being of your collaborators into account
Taking care of your collaborators’ well-being, what a crazy idea! After all, do they actually care about you? Of course not, and they don’t hesitate badmouthing you behind your back, as soon as they get the chance. Put a stop to any kind of attention for your collaborators, whether these are compliments, planning out well-being workshops or even re-organizing workspaces.
Don’t prioritize your tasks
You get tasks from everywhere when you’re an Office Manager and one easily feels swamped. Even if you’re snowed under, don’t bother prioritizing tasks, it’s a waste of time. You can use this time to finish the Tetris game you began in the subway for example. To add on, don’t hesitate complaining to your boss regularly or anyone else who is willing to hear that you’re super swamped and you can’t take it anymore. If one talks about prioritizing tasks, answer by saying that you don’t believe in such an abstract concept and you prefer being submerged than organizing yourself.
Don’t respect deadlines
This supplier needs to be paid tomorrow at the latest, he has sent 2 reminders already and even gave you some extra time, when you spoke to him and acted as you were tearing up due to the so called money issues of your startup while the latter has just raised 10 million bucks recently. However, you just don’t feel like taking care of this payment. When we don’t want to do something, there is no use forcing, otherwise it’s going against nature. Do this when a shred of desire comes along or never. In fact, use this principle at work generally and don’t pay attention to the various deadlines, whether these concern organizing events, the life of collaborators, administration or even the relationship with partners.
Don’t take the company’s culture into account
Everyone talks about the company’s culture to you, but what is it exactly about? Some random slogans that your boss decided to print on the yellowed walls of the dump, which is used as the workspace in your company? No use. And when it comes to adapting the Office Management actions to the company’s culture, it’s even worse. No, completely ignore your company’s culture to define the actions to implement and don’t adapt to anything whatsoever. At the end of the day, all the companies are the same, isn’t their main goal to make money? Yours is no exception.
Don’t try to change things
When you joined the company, your boss told you: “there is a lot of work, you’ll need to spruce things up, all the established processes were set up 10 years ago”. You gave a positive answer, all enthused so that you get this job. At that point in time, your goal wasn’t to get fired. Today, you see things from a different angle. Like the famous saying goes “Why do things differently when it has always been the same?”. Never change a team that loses. It’s useless changing things, processes, established actions, service providers or events: all this is trivial. Just stick to the established things and don’t change anything.
Don’t pay attention to detail
The registration number on this invoice sent by your company seems shady and with good reason as it takes up an entire line. For a second there, you wanted to check with an old bill then luckily you reasoned with yourself: why bother with such details? One comes across many details as an Office Manager. Some Office Managers pay too much attention to this according to you. You’re not in school, you prefer ignoring these details and acting as if you don’t understand that details are the most important aspect.
It’s certain that your boss won’t be indifferent when faced with your efforts, if you were to use these tips. He should quickly summon you for a meeting during which he’ll tell you that you’re fired. No need to thank us!
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